Still learning at an “advanced maternal age”…

I am just getting into this whole blogging thing, and I have to tell you, for a fairly Type-A personality IN PERSON, I have found it surprisingly scary to interact on the web.  I don’t know why?? 

Maybe it is because I can’t read body-language to sense when it is OK to “jump in” to a conversation.   Maybe it’s simply because it’s new.  I’m not sure.  But I can tell you that so far, I have found a wonderfully supportive group of Moms who have been willing to give me advise and support.  I feel like I have made a whole community of new friends in just the several months I have been at this.  But it is still new and scary and these are not feelings I like or am accustomed to.

I think the only other time I recall feelings resembling these was when I first entered the “Mommy crowd” in our neighborhood – play-groups, playground get-togethers, mall days, etc.  I was so out of my element.  Most of these Moms, even though they were all pretty friendly (I mean they invited the old lady to attend, right?), are also significantly younger than me, and that fact was made very clear as I look at their polished, unlined faces and hear references to things in their childhood that I recall distinctly as being my own recollections from college or later.  (Oh, the FIRST Gulf War atrocity.  Yeah, I remember having a few beers with friends and hearing about it on the news.  OH!  You were just starting kindergarten and only remember your parents being upset.   Hmmmmm…)  EEK!  I got over that one pretty quickly though because no one but me seemed to care.  I don’t even think they noticed.  Of course, I tried 9and still try) not to broadcast my “advanced maternal age”.

I was however, not attuned to any kid’s shows (Dora who?), or toys (my little one was still under 6 months) and I felt at a loss in conversations about potty training.  How old are they for that – five or six?  HA!

I could talk for hours about my old work, but no one cared about politics and communications anymore.  I was always very at ease in those work situations because I had felt in control, and also in social situations because I was the proverbial butterfly.  I loved the bar scene and parties.  But now I was attending children’s birthday parties and while I could throw a mean cocktail party with little notice was terrified of my little one’s impending first birthday.

So, if I chicken-shit out and don’t throw her a big first birthday bash for all the play-group kids will I stunt her for LIFE?!?!

But surprisingly, in time, heading to story-time at the library became less tenuous because I started making and receiving phone calls to attend with other Mommys and kids.  The first call had me feeling like I was calling a boy for the first time in Junior High.  I was sweating and hung up twice before it rang.  I think I was so afraid that these Moms were only being nice to me because of my daughter but that they could see RIGHT THROUGH me to my former self.  I mean becoming a Mommy, while it is the very best thing that has ever happened (and I don’t give a damn about that cliché – it’s true!) wasn’t exactly planned.  I was sure they saw me as a fraud and I was afraid of putting myself out there for ridicule and rejection.

But I made the call.  And the Mommy and her son weren’t home.  They also didn’t call back because they were out of town, but of course, I thought I was being dissed by the Mommys.  But I tried again the next week and guess what?  They came by and played on the swings and we went to story-time together.  This sort of opened up invitations from others and made it easier for me to be the initiator. 

Now, I doubt I will ever be the host of massive play-dates.  I just don’t think I have that in me right now.  Excuse number one – I’m old remember?  But I feel pretty secure in the Mommy friends I have clicked with – and a few that I like that otherwise I would have never crossed paths with.  And while I may never be close to these women, I am at least friendly with them.

And this leads me to my current situation of trying again to wade through the Mommy Blogs, identify ones that seem to “click” with my personality and introduce myself.  Kind of scary, but I’m working through it.  I think I’ll be OK.  Because all-in-all, when it comes to being a Mommy, we DO all have something in common that anyone who isn’t a Mommy can never relate to. 

I just hope I don’t come on too strong. 

For those Mommy Bloggers (and others!!) I’m communicating with already:

Jeff at www.alignnorth.com

Kim at http://buchheitcreative.com/

http://skimbaco.blogspot.com/

http://acowboyswife.com/

http://www.tubbybundle.com/blog/

http://queenofspainblog.com/

http://www.cafepress.com/argylestripes

and those I will in the future,

                           kick my ass if you need to.

____________________________________________________________

Art imitates life, and life imitates art.

What I see every day influences what I create, so writing this blog and creating my designs are natural extensions of who I am.

If you are interested in viewing my designs, primarily for kids but also some cool stuff for adults and also doggies (who we all know are integral parts of all families) check them out at:
http://www.cafepress.com/sugarsprouts

See you around the mountains and canyons of northern AZ!

“If you don’t laugh at life, it sneaks up and bites you in the ass!”

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2 Responses to “Still learning at an “advanced maternal age”…”

  1. Lori Says:

    Well gosh darn! That’s awful nice of you to have me on the list:) Thank you so much! There’s a JEYENORMOUS mommy blogger world.. You’ll fall in love with all them and you’ll get the hang of things much quicker than you think.

  2. sugarsprouts Says:

    Hey, you guys have helped me plenty. I really appreciate it! I probably will have to bug you occasionally until I get the hang of stuff. Awww, being called to the potty – good stuff!!!!

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